Whoa. It was really hard not drinking yesterday. We got home from vacation, our kid went to visit a friend, and my partner and I were having a great time watching a movie by ourselves on the couch. And I thought, “Oh, you should get some wine to go with this. That would be perfect!” So, for the next hour or so I felt a very strong pull to drink wine, but I didn’t do it. And now, I’m really glad.
Cause I’ve got plans for today. Not a lot, but plans nonetheless. I’m going to write this post (check!), finally put away the Halloween decorations (yes, I admit I had them out for all of November. sigh), cut up some boxes for recycling (maybe), do a little laundry, and have my mom over for dinner. We missed Thanksgiving with her since we went to my dad’s house (they’re divorced), so I’m making dinner tonight. Tomorrow, I’m going to wake up early, drink coffee in bed, exercise for 15 minutes, stretch for 10 minutes, meditate for 5 minutes, then start the day. Am I feeling better? Yes, I’d say so.
This is what I start doing when I feel better – planning and making lists. I was once in the hospital for several months following a serious accident. I knew I was finally getting better when I asked for some paper and a pen (it was the 90s and I didn’t have a laptop) and started making plans and lists.
It is helpful for me to write this down so I can look back and see how it happens. I really want to see what happens if I get enough sober time together. I don’t want to sabotage myself in a moment of weakness, and I’m hoping this blog will help. I don’t feel like I need to keep writing that I won’t drink today every day (but I definitely won’t drink today).