Both Trapped and Grateful

I’m feeling pretty grateful today. Still trapped, of course. We’ve been on lockdown now for soooooooooo long. But also grateful. Grateful that I’m sober another day. Grateful that my mom is still healthy. Grateful that my friends and family are healthy. Grateful that I have a home and a job. Grateful that my cat is snuggled next to me, I’m about to eat some spicy cauliflower for brunch, and my partner is DJing next to me. And it sounds good. He’s not in one of his discordant, experimental sound moods. The lockdown has been pretty good for him. He has been making music like crazy, something he hasn’t been able to do for a long time. When he has too many choices, he has trouble deciding what to do next, but when the options are limited, he blooms. It is so interesting what we are learning about ourselves during this strange, strange time.

I’m also grateful that my massive work project is over, I’ve cleaned my house, and now I can just relax. Plot out my next moves, lockdown-wise. Prepare to help my kid more with homeschooling next week. Make a schedule for regular exercise. Get excited again about my other habit-change projects. For all my talk in earlier posts, I really haven’t successfully maintained my stretching, exercise, meditating projects. Hmmm. I don’t want to be all talk.

I’m trying to psych myself up for the challenge of continuing to move forward while, at the same time, feeling very stuck. But also grateful. Perhaps you can relate.

Love and support to all of you.

xoxo

Leafy

10 thoughts on “Both Trapped and Grateful

  1. oh man do I relate 🙂 and yes, lockdown is a bit like experimental conditions where we can observe ourselves 🙂 It’s cool your partner is making all this music and that you have so many things to feel grateful about ! I’m in a similar place, seeing the glass half-full these days. Enjoy the cauliflower, and the joys of moving forward-inward 🙂 xxx Anne

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I really relate. I’m learning a lot about myself and how small things make me happy. I too am really grateful for many aspects of my life right now. I feel very lucky. It’s hard because at the same time because we are all stuck. Sounds like you are doing just fine to me though xxx

    Liked by 2 people

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